Meditation - How To Get It To Improve Your Relationship

Meditate Your Way To Something Better

Here’s my story … so follow along and seriously think about taking action, at the end.

Peace and Tranquility At The Core

Sure, most people who have never meditated might think it’s woo-woo stuff.

I know I did and thought that for many years.

It wasn’t until recently when I bumped into a buddy and fellow XL Foundation Life Member – Jeremy Britton that my mind was made up to get serious and stop fluffing around about meditation.

Previously, I simply didn’t know the benefits and never realised how to actually do it, in the first place.

While I have sat in on a few meditation sessions before, I was just plain confused in what I was doing and what it was I thought meditation was. The first lesson here is it’s a calming of the mind. And when you have calm, you have the mental (and some say spiritual) space to ‘allow’.

For me, it was to allow the space for gratitude, forgiveness, calm and love.

Your reasons might differ and that’s cool.

Do You Realise Your Own Internal Turmoil?

Modern life sees your brain in constant overdrive.

You’ll be in a continual mental battle over work, paying bills, the kids, school, your partner, fights, what’s for dinner and thousands of other things that bombard your head.

The human brain produces approximately 70,000 thoughts on an average day – WikiAnswers

Now that’s around a different thought every 1.2 seconds – enormous mental clutter.

You can now see there’s little space for mental clarity.

Nothing for inner peace.

How Can It Help a Relationship Though?

Meditation produces the time-out our brains and body harmony need.

• You gain more calm
• Balance in moods
• Decrease stress levels
• Derail the turmoil train

When you can gain some composure, you can then view your partner in a different light of thankfulness and gratitude. Angst towards them diminishes. The peaks and troughs of your moods smoothes out.

Stormy seas of a rocky relationship calm.

That’s worth striving towards, don’t you think?

No Idea How To Meditate – Any Tips?

As I said in the beginning, I stalled in meditating as it appeared difficult.

The secret was in just doing it.

Update August 5, 2016:

I’d previously recommended Meditation Timer+ app but it’s been buggy and have now found and switched to Still – there’s even an Apple Watch version if that’s of interest.

Just do a search if Still doesn’t suit your needs.

Ideally, I’ve read to meditate twice a day for 25 minutes each session is a great regular life practise to attain.

I started at 10 minutes for the first week, just to ‘do it’ and start forming the habit I knew I needed to have.

It’s a lifetime commitment to tranquility and I wanted it for me.

The main thrust to it all is realising you already have the peace you want. It’s just covered over by all those damn thoughts that keep popping in.

The trick for everyone is to recognise they are going to drift in.

Treat them as newspapers and allow them to blow back out without paying them attention.

Be OK to see them. Never beat yourself up in having more thoughts that drift in one day than another.

My Own Meditation Process

Remember different people do things differently – this is what works for me.

• Sit upright comfortably with good posture – I personally avoid sitting on the floor with leg crossed as I find it uncomfortable. This is my meditation. I don’t need anyone to think I’m a Zen Master
• Concentrate on your breathing. Deep breathes. Focus on the in and the out. You’re wanting to rid thoughts from your brain so it’s about internalising.
• Imagine the breathe is coming in through your Mind’s Eye that’s situated just above the space between your eyes – sounds a little kooky, I know but just do this.
• See the breathe flowing in, down into your lungs as a subtle blue light, filling them up.
• And the reverse as you breathe out through the same process.
• As you visualise this, blow out any ‘newspaper thoughts’ that wander in. Revert back to breathe focus.
• Using the Still meditation timer, I have programmed it to give off Zen Bell sounds every 5 minutes which is wonderful to jolt my focus back if I have wandered off.
• Rinse and repeat til your session completes

Speak Your Mind, With Your Opinion

Nice to see you made it this far so here’s what you can do next:

• Do you think you could do with some inner peace and calm?
• What’s stopping you from giving meditation a concerted effort?
• Click one of the Share buttons – your friends can then enjoy this article too.

And thanks for reading too – Let us know your thoughts in the comments.